Meet Manny – the guy I’ve been dating! We met via OkCupid- the dating app!
Let’s jump back to five weeks ago. Seeing as my love life was actually non-existent, I decided to start considering the possibilities of online dating more seriously. I was tempted to download gay iPhone apps like Grindr, Hornet, or Jack’d but determined they weren’t exactly aimed at building relationships.
I decided to quickly sign back into my old OkCupid account because.. why not? I originally created one when I was a freshman at Rutgers but I never got very far with it. I made a few updates to my profile and then closed out of it again.
While studying with my friend for calculus, I noticed some guy had randomly messaged me! Whoa! Haha.
I was a little reserved at first but after talking for a while, I felt comfortable making the decision to meet up with him in public for a dinner date. My friend kept yelling at me because she was worried dating would distract me from calculus – a very real concern for me, as well. For that reason, we created the hashtag #DerivativesNotDates to keep me on track. 😉
Since calculus ended, I’ve spent COUNTLESS hours with Manny. As someone who is a true introvert at heart, I’ve been pleasantly surprised to find the time I spend with Manny doesn’t wear down on me at all even though I’m fairly certain he’s an extrovert. This has been an issue with every other guy that I’ve seen and for that reason, those romantic connections never got very far. Here, it’s not an issue! I don’t know why.
While I was away in Turks & Caicos, my sister was kind enough to let me use her iPhone 5S to FaceTime Manny.
My sister makes me laugh. Sometimes I wonder if she talks to Manny more than I do. I go over to Manny’s place only to find out he’s texting my sister. They follow each other on Instagram. He followed HER on Twitter before he followed me. My sister even added HIM to a group chat with HER friends.
I really love the time we spend together. I think part of the reason why I like him is because he’s so smart and ambitious. He’s really into science and is currently studying neuroscience – a subject I may end up majoring in myself!
It’s been five weeks of constant dating and just last night, we finally had a conversation about officially being boyfriends. The situation is a little complex though. We go to different colleges but we’re less than an hour away. I’m a sophomore and he’s going to be a senior but he thinks he’s going to stay an extra year to complete a double-major. We’re concerned about getting serious and then possibly having to deal with him moving far away for graduate school later on.
Not sure what’s going to happen in the long run but I think we’re going to try to keep things going once we go back to school and see how things go from there. Even if we only see each other once every couple of weeks, I think it’ll be ok. Plus, I’ve got a car and we both have access to the train. We’ll see. Only time will tell! 🙂
Update: After about 4 or 5 months of being together, we pretty much stopped talking. I guess life got in the way and things sort of just fell apart. I’d elaborate but I’d rather not get into it right now. 🙁
great photo! great story!
Thank you so much! 🙂 Glad you enjoyed!
You worry too much. Just be in the moment and appreciate. 🙂
Hahaha ok I’ll try! 🙂
Cute couple alert! You have the biggest smile on every picture and I can see why. It’s great to see that part of your life going so well. As for the other stuff, don’t even sweat it. Just enjoy the dating stage and see how it goes. If it’s meant to be then you’ll work it out.
Lol thank you Kevin! What you said in your last sentence is exactly the message I’ve been trying to put into words. I’ll say that to him the next time we’re together and see if that makes him a little less apprehensive about being in a relationship.
That last picture is beautiful! Happy 5 weeks. Excited for you, Rocky. yay!
Sending a big thank you from me and Manny! 🙂
dating, seriously? Just dating and no string attached for 5 years?
How about for the next years?
I really like the photo btw
Wait what?? Sorry, I don’t follow what you’re saying… I never said anything about “5 years” or anything about no-strings-attached. We’ve been dating for 8 weeks now and we are exclusive.
And thank you!!! 😀
Did you assess his MBTI psychological type?
HAHAHA I’ve spent MANY hours pondering on it but I can’t figure it out and it’s driving me crazy!!!
I THINK he is an ENTJ… Maybe…
Cool. So what type of personalities do you think fit with you?
By the way, I like your hairstyle.
I typically get along with both E and I. I think I’m happier with Ns and Fs. And I prefer Js but can live with Ps.
So the fact that (I think) he’s an extrovert and a thinker means there’s potential for conflict but it all depends on the person. For the time being, it’s working out!
And thank you! I actually just got a haircut yesterday and they went way shorter than I was hoping for…. :'(
I hope your hair now is not as short as your boyfriend’s. Lol.
The positive thing now is that you can go longer without a haircut until your hair grows back.
I met my boyfriend on OkCupid, too, almost exactly four years ago! (He’s an INFJ and I’m an ENFP.)
It’s great to know others have had success with their website as well. I actually don’t know too many other people who have met their significant other on OkCupid. Also, interesting personality match!
woahhh finally i find another infj gay boy. u know the world, we r so alienate. u really2 hav a so f*cking GREAT life, Im envious of ur good fortune(literally) . im trying to change from gay to straight, we know its hard T.T wish me luck. and u, keep writing! really love ur blog (sorry for my bad english :’) ) lol
Hi Ferdi! Thank you for the kind words. Please do not be envious! I have problems just like anyone else does. Use that energy towards bettering your own situation. Also, I’d advise against trying to change from gay to straight since I’m fairly certain that that’s both impossible and psychologically damaging. In the meantime, let me know if you need help with anything! I’m here not only to write but also to listen. 🙂
yeah you right, all this time i was wasting my energy. its impossible & very tiring my mind. well, you know its religion thing. i have a faith from my instinct and intuition (haha relax, i wont argue about my religion, i know, we know all this stuff going :’) at least become bisexual) and i dont want to see my parents cry (really love them). well its so hard to be an infj lol. thx for listening me(you are definitely an infj 🙂 ), really your blog help me a lot. You should keep all you have! your life are the one I am dreaming of (totally agree of your boyfriend type lol ). thx rocky 🙂 (its only 0.25% T.T oh God whyyy)
I never wanted to see my parents cry either and that’s in part why I never wanted to come out to them however, I eventually realized that crying is a natural response so it’s not as awful as you might expect. My parent’s didn’t even cry when I told them so I worried for nothing. I think it’s important to accept yourself and understand that you only have one life so you should live it to the fullest.
Honestly, I’m happy to help. Let me know if you run into any other problems!