I can’t believe I’m saying this but my roommate actually talked me into going to another college party last night. I only went to one frat party last semester and just as I suspected, I hated almost everything about it and said I’d probably never go to one again. But this party was a little different- it was a gay party.
“No, I’m not going; I don’t even know what to wear…” I said to my roommate.
“Come onnnn. You have to. We’re going! Please?” he said.
After much back-and-forth arguing, he convinced me. Admittedly, I was curious to see who was there. I thought the chance to meet more LGBT people could be fun!
Let me just say, it was COLD but no jackets my roommate said… You know how it is… the less clothes, the better! Even in -10 degree weather.
We ran over to the bus stop, missed the bus, and then ran back to our dorm. 15 minutes later, we ran back to the bus stop, missed it AGAIN, and ran back to our dorm. I was basically crying and watching my tears freeze to the skin on my face at this point. THE THIRD TIME WE WENT EARLY, stood in the freezing cold with no jacket for 5 minutes, and finally made it onto that bus! THANK GOODNESS.
So we arrive at the party and walked down into the basement where all of the action was at. Instantly saw exactly what you would expect: alcohol, over-the-top dancing, strangers making out.
I wanted to leave.
But we stayed and I met this really nice guy who told me all about his boyfriend who’s on a trip to some other country. Sweet kid. At least, that’s what I thought until I saw him making out with another guy later that night. My values = breached.
I had not one, not two, but THREE PEOPLE spill their drinks on my new shirt. Fun!
Around 1:30 in the morning, this one tall guy walked past me and I looked at him. He approached me and said hi. I mean, it was basically pitch black but his outline seemed attractive and he had a nice voice.
We small-talked as much as we possibly could over the loud music. We MIGHT have made out briefly – but nothing actually lasted because something bothered me. I didn’t know who this guy was. I knew his name and maybe a few random facts about him but that was it. I COULDN’T EVEN “SEE” THE GUY I WAS KISSING. (Nor could I fully hear him.) So why were we going to make out? How was that okay?
He did turn out to be a really sweet guy so we exchanged numbers and hopefully he and I will meet up someplace else besides a party next time. And if not, then he wasn’t the right guy to begin with and I’ll know I did the right thing.
Just an interesting social norm to think about: Why is it acceptable to kiss attractive strangers you briefly talk to at parties… but not people in everyday life?